When you enlisted,
in a time so far away,
you did not think it would
have gone this way: you agreed
to put an uncomfy armor that slows
you down and hampers, agreed to go around
with that stupid helmet, but why using only blank
weapons? And, moreover, why the waistcoat must
attract magnetically the shots from any idiot that fires in
any direction and amplify their effect, so that at the first shot
fired anywhere, you fall dead? But, by gosh!, why did you enlist between the...

After two years of period of service, more or less voluntary, having prodigiously survived to the slaughters of the Yeti Knights, you have decided to escape.
You take the opportunity given by the n-th defeat, caused by a handful of fluff bear cubs got out from the Luna Park of GioKèndoR (a traidmurck of GiocAreA & GioCòndoR – take it as it is!). You will have to go through the above-mentioned Luna Park, to reach the freedom.
Will you succeed?
You have 5 life points, represented by the following little circles O O O O O. You will have to cancel them when you asked to do so: when you cancel the last one, you will be defeated and you will die as a hero (more or less). You begin from paragraph 1.

1. The Luna Park of GioKèndoR has an entrance like the Disneyland one: you have to put a very expensive card in the special slot and revolve the turnstile. Do you pay (go to paragraph 7) or not (go to 7)?

2. The marbles in the glass bow recognize you and, knowing that this could be the only glory opportunity in their sad life, they assault you. Successfully, obviously. Cancel a life point. Feeling washed out, do you escape from their hits going towards the laundry (4) or towards the smithy of the Sword in the Stone (4)?

3. An arm comes off from the roundabout towards you, squirts at macpitwo speed and hits you. Cancel a life point. Staggering, you look around for something to drink: do you go to the sailorman’s bar (5) or to the Mexican restaurant (5)?

4. While you are in the middle of the street, from two opposite windows an anvil and a washing-machine are thrown. They crash your imperial large head. Cancel a life point. If you have finished your life points, 8, otherwise, 6.

5. You have had just the time to enter: your head is reached by a flat-iron angrily hurled by a waiter that tries to kill a bothering mosquito. Cancel a life point. The blow flings you in front of the distributor of chewing gums and plastic marbles: do you put a coin in to take something (2) or not (2)?

6. ... You are not only ill-starred, but even analphabet! But since, all things considered, the fact of not even knowing how to draw up the accounts could even be determining to be enlisted among the Imperial large heads, we’ll take it for good. So you are a little happier: YOU HAVE WON! (if you are pleased...).

7. The anti-intrusion mechanism of the Luna Park is terrible (it conveys a jump spark of 17,000 volts) and not at all infallible. It is not a surprise that it hits you, striking you down. Cancel a life point. You heighten again and, stunned, you run away. Do you run towards the roundabouts with the hobby-horses (3) or the roundabout with the Alice’s cups (3)?

8. A cruel and unmerciful child seizes a black cat by its tail, rotates it over his head and throws it towards your lifeless body. And while the cat touches wood flying in your direction, the iper-bad misfortune field of your armor activates and repels it! A miracle! You have lost, sure, but now we know which are the weapons to give to the rebels to do a not completely uneven struggle: bazookas armed with black cats! THE END.